Well, it's crunch time. Less than 48 hours till submission time. And while I once was the type of writer who could stay up into the wee hours of the morning writing, having a wee babe at home makes that impossible if I plan to be a functioning mom at all.
Rowan is enroute to his Nan's house - my mother-in-law - for the day and now the parental guilt is settling in. Since last Tuesday I've been pawning him off on anyone willing to take him for a few hours so I can get in some writing. Now I've shipped him out for the day. With just 10,000 words or so left, I should be in the jubilant almost there stage. Instead I'm worrying about my baby. If this project works and I'm lucky enough to get published, I'll need days to write much more often, and that makes me sad because I miss having him around, even in his fussy stages.
Time to suck it up. I'm doing this for him, really. So that we can see if Mommy can make it as a writer. If I manage to convince the folks at Avon that I'm the kind of writer that can appeal to their audiences, it would mean a world of difference for us. Not that I'll get rich doing it. That only happens to the mega-stars. I don't even know if my favourite romance authors are really rich. But if I could manage to at least make what I make as my salary now, I could stay at home, spending much more time with Rowan that I could if I had to go back to work full-time. So that's why I'm doing it. I might feel like a bad mommy this morning, but if it pays off, then in the end, won't I be a better mom?
Anyway, the book is coming along fantastically. I'm basicially writing the lead up to the ending now. I'd love to get all 10 thousand written today, but I'll have to get into some kind of wild groove for that to happen. Instead, I'll aim for 7000 words. That will leave 3000 tomorrow, which I should be able to do with Rowan at home, and once daddy gets home from work.
I'm off to physio now, and then it's nose to the grind. I can't believe how close I'm getting to actually accomplishing this!